Slowing My Roll

I've always tried to do crafts with my children. I feel like the time I spend with them, the creativeness, improvisation, and overall art my children are doing are educational and definitely beneficial to their emotional and mental health. Here lately, I've been feeling lost, not having something I have to do everyday gets me down. I need to work towards something. I need clear goals and checklists. Honestly, I have trouble slowing down and enjoying the moment like I really should. I've learned through the past few years that doing crafts with my children gives ME enjoyment. It makes me feel like I achieved something, even if I didn't get anything else done and the rest of the day was bad, at least I did something successful with my children. It makes me feel like a good mom because I sometimes don't. What's a plus is that my kids love to do crafts with me. With a sickly baby, sometimes I don't get to participate, just set everything up for them. But I help, watch, comment, praise, and of course take pictures. One thing that makes me ME, is that I absolutely love fall. I'm trying to make fall exciting for my children. Because I've been feeling down, and because my kids love it, I decided I was going to try to do at least one fall craft daily, even if it's just coloring.

 Yesterday we colored squirrels.
This was Nikolai's

Victoria's wanted hers to be pink pink pink. 
She colored the eyes so much that they were holes and this upset her.
I couldn't have that.
Some glue and googely eyes did the trick.

Alexandria is still feeling bad but I think she's slowly getting better. She finally started talking again today. She told daddy "bye" "hi" and she waved. She clapped. She played a little. She's still grouchy and pulling at her ears, but I think she's a little better and that makes me happy. I am totally exhausted though, I hope she sleeps good tonight.

Today the kids ran around playing soldiers while I cleaned in between holding my sick baby. Victoria eventually got tired and laid in the floor for a while. I put together the big old car seat for Alexandria to use in a few months. She likes it already.

When Alexandria took a nap, I cooked up some pumpkin spice play dough. I made some orange and some yellow. I gave the kids plastic spoons and knives, and some medicine cups to play with. I think they quite enjoyed playing with it. I enjoyed the smell.
1 cup flour
1 cup water
1/4 cup salt
2 Tbsps of cream of tartar
2 Tbsp of pumpkin pie spice
yellow and red food coloring

Cook on medium heat until it makes a ball, 
blah blah,
you know the drill!

 I've come to learn that some people just don't understand my excitement for fall. We went to the library today to get fall themed books. When I asked for help the woman at the help desk looked at me strange and said "fall books?" I said, "Yeah, ya know, like autumn, pumpkins, scarecrows, Johnny Appleseed, that sort of thing..." "Oh, um well they are probably mixed in, you'll just have to look." Well thanks for the help! I managed to find a few random books, none of them what I really had in mind, but oh well.

One thing I always do during fall is burn pumpkin scented candles. I love the smell of pumpkin, apple, peach, coconut, and cupcake, and that's usually what I burn. I decided to mix it up this year and try different scents. I got "pure white woods" from Wal-Mart. After letting it burn I decided that I loved the scent so much because it smells like my man. It's not strong though, just enough to get a good whiff here and there. 

My dad advised me to slow down, smell the flowers, let go of the little things, and believe that everyone is doing the best that they can. It's hard, but I'm going to start slowing down and enjoying my life more. I keep thinking that I'll enjoy myself when I get a job, and a house, and the things that we want. But I have what I want and they are all tucked into bed. Tomorrow is a new day, a day to spend loving my children and myself. I hope I get some sleep tonight and get the house clean tomorrow. If not, then oh well, a sick baby needs her mommy and I'm going to be there even if it means a dirty house. And I'm not letting a dirty house make me feel bad about myself anymore! 

Good night ya'll!


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